Rich Tola teaches Yoga at the domestic violence shelterLast weekend I decided it was time to move back to the beach – since I spent the summer of 1985 a few hundred yards from the ocean in beautiful Marina del Rey. However brief my first southern Cali beach experience lasted, I knew I’d be back.
But wait, don’t I need a “place to live” and a “job” and at least “get to know the area” before I just pack-up and move there?
Not at all, if I believe in myself and I’m not afraid to jump. Not literally, of course, but in way that describes what most people experience when they’re asked to commit to something new and challenging. Like Yoga. Or walking 2 miles every single morning before you take a shower. Or doing my 100 consecutive days of 5 Minute Fat Burning Workouts on YouTube (all of them, especially my AB ones!). Oftentimes we experience subtle fear and inward resistance usually followed by “rational” reasons for not doing it. Like “I can’t do Yoga because I’m not flexible”.
You know how many times I hear that phrase – about a dozen times a week. That’s right, because I usually talk fitness with people I meet and encourage them to embrace a daily fitness program that’s based on Yoga. Simple, effective and to the point. That’s my style, especially when it comes to respecting yourself with an arsenal of exercises that’ll stymie Father Time.
Being thoughtful of others can be quite elusive, especially when you’re dealing with some form of adversity in your life. Nevertheless, it’s something that makes for a better human experience, so always be conscious of how your actions – and inactions – will affect others.
Case in point: Yesterday I had the afternoon free and I was really looking forward to seeing the film Mud, with Matthew McConaughey and Reese Witherspoon (I heard it was excellent!). And since my friend and I were running a bit late – which is usually the case in Los Angeles for a boatload of reasons – we knew we had minutes to spare once we got there. But as soon as we parked, my friend takes a call from her Mom.
Not good.
Because she proceeded to have a heated discussion with her with no regard for me or the start of the movie. So what did I do? I waved for her to meet me inside, then I darted off to buy the tickets. And to wait…which I did for the next 15 minutes until I refunded our unused tickets and went back to the car – where my non-thoughtful friend was still arguing with her Mom.
So whatever your situation, remember that your actions will affect others…so Be Thoughtful.
Enjoy – R
PS – here’s a thoughtful clip from my AudioBook, Chapter 54 – Mother’s Day
COMING SOON in AUDIO BOOKThe past few days I’ve been in the studio recording the Audio Book (coming soon) for my memoir, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, and had a chance to reflect on one of my favorite lessons learned on Wall Street.
Chapter 21 – Sit Tall in the Saddle, tells about when I interned with a top broker at Prudential Securities:
“The day I arrived, the first thing he did was hand me a framed picture of a cowboy sitting on a horse looking sternly off into the distance. Beneath the picture the caption read, ‘When you ride alone, you must sit tall in the saddle’. I just looked at him and smiled, while he looked at me with a serious face and said, ‘Always remember that and you’ll be fine.’ To this day, I can’t help but think how the little things I learned from some of Wall Street’s million dollar men continue to inspire me.”
So Sit Tall in the Saddle in whatever you do today…and don’t forget your Daily Fitness Program!
When was the last time you stepped on the scale? If it wasn’t this morning, then it’s Time to Weigh-in!
That’s right, it’s time for you to check your weight as we enter the final three weeks of the year. And if you haven’t taken my advice from last New Year’s Day – click HERE to read my blog – then consider the following discourse “to make the better choice” as articulated in Chapter 67 of my new memoir,
“If you consider Lucy, a 3.2 million year-old ape, as our human ancestor, then as a species we’ve been around a long time. Individually though, it’s less than 100 years. The way I figure it, I’ll be happy to get 80 great years out of it, so why not keep my body (and mind) as young as possible, for as long as possible. How do I plan on doing that? Through proper diet and exercise, two of the hardest simple words in the English language. Because to do each one correctly requires pain and sacrifice. Maybe discomfort is a better word than pain, but you know what I mean. And to master each of these two simple words, you need to “self-correct”. Self-correct refers to making adjustments along the way, consciously reminding yourself to make the better choice.”
And for those of you who believe there’s no chance you can lose those extra pounds you’ve already gained this holiday season – NONSENSE!
Anyone can lose a few measly pounds in less than 21 days! Just MAKE THE BETTER CHOICE when it comes to food and alcohol – you know what that means – and be sure to embrace a Daily Fitness Program. And if you don’t have money for a gym or yoga studio, then start walking everyday and/or start doing any one of my 100 Days of 5-Minute Fat Burning Workouts on YouTube: Boulevard Zen.
Because who doesn’t have 5 minutes a day to respect themselves? Enjoy – R
author, Rich TolaCall this a Rant, but the following commentary is meant to help you ladies SMARTEN UP when it comes to men. That’s right, smarten up, because you can be quite stupid when it comes to wasting your precious time obsessing over the wrong guy. And since most women are like little girls who never grow-up and believe their Prince Charming in shining armor is going to swoop them away – sorry ladies, that only works for Julia Roberts & Richard Gere – they fall victim to bad-boy Gigolos wanting to score as their Mr. Right Now. I should know – I was one of them.
Let me explain with a real life example. This weekend I spent an hour with my sexy cool 33-year-old friend who’s also a really sweet gal whom I never slept with – which makes it easier for me to be her therapist (something I advise never to do, by the way, in my memoir Chapter 15 – Just Say No). She told me last week she met a really hot guy who she spent 3 days texting and talking to before they met for coffee on the 4th day. Sparks were flying and they talked about “meaningful relationships” and how they were both “done with the party scene” and all that.
So her 29 year-old Prince Charming talks like he’s “the one” and asks her to dinner the following night. The next day he never called or anything. So she texted him. No response. Now it’s a week later with no communication whatsoever and she’s whining to me about how she’s getting older and she’s not that attractive any more, and how she feels totally rejected by this chucklehead she really thought was the one. And of course she’s obsessing about whether he’ll still call, and if he does, should she say anything about him blowing her off for dinner or just leave it alone. Now I would call that wasting your precious time, wouldn’t you? So what did I suggest to my love-smitten friend? Forgettabout him!
Ladies, take heed of my favorite 4 letter word…NEXT. Because Mr. Right Now definitely got my friend’s text and choose not to contact her. He’s playing her for a fool and only wants to secure the power – don’t let him do it. Move on to better and brighter pastures and remain open to meeting Mr. Right. It’s not this guy, that’s for sure. Because if a guy doesn’t follow through, then he’s got something or someone else he wants to pursue that takes priority over you. Not good. Be strong and kick him to the curb. Better yet, run! Because Gigolos will only chip away at your self-confidence and self-respect. Something you should NEVER let happen. Respect yourself, just like you would with a Daily Fitness Program. However impossible it may seem, you CAN do it – if you just try and never give up! Because ANYONE can workout every single day and drink from the Fountain of Youth, as explained and simplified by me in Chapter 67 – Self Correct, for when the right man (or woman) does come along.
I have – for the past 40 years.
And for anyone looking to expand your mind – or change careers – here’s what Erica Lamberg with media giant Gannett writes about my memoir, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, www.mycentraljersey.com (click link to read article).
There’s 386 pages packed full of 69 bite-sized Chapters detailing the fascinating journey of this street-smart Sicilian kid from “Jersey” who grew up poor then forged his way through the Wharton and Kellogg Business Schools, to Wall Street juggernauts Goldman Sachs and Drexel Burnham Lambert, to signing contracts with Donald Trump and reaching a net-worth of $10 million. Only to lose it all in the blink-of-an-eye, leading to an Epiphany (Chapter 47) that led to Yoga and enlightenment.
A mouthful I know, but it’s sure been a wild ride with tons of witty and heartfelt stories about growing up Sicilian with “Goombata Sal” and “representing the family”, to the “cute-boy syndrome” that fueled romances with a bevy of engaged and married women (and NYC strippers), to the plethora of major US cities and exotic locales where I lived, worked and played including NYC, LA, Philadelphia, Chicago, Hong Kong, Singapore and Malaysia, to the “nobody makes it here” streets of Hollywood.
You’ll also learn about domestic violence and why I founded a charity, The Boulevard Zen Foundation, to teach the benefits of Yoga to women and children living in domestic violence shelters. A portion of all my book and DVD sales are donated to this cause.
Enjoy…and don’t forget to get your workout in! – Rich
This was the last thing I said to the twenty-something year old subway rider I met on the Red Line in North Hollywood last night. I was returning home from a day at the beach with my friend Sara (a rather impromptu visit, thus my jeans and Calvin’s) when this really large dude started speaking to me.
As soon as this guy sat down he looked over at me and said, “So what’a ya bench 350 pounds or something?” I smiled and said no, and then I asked if he ever tried yoga. I already knew the answer, but it was a way of breaking the ice about his size. He was at least 50 pounds overweight, and after a few facts about yoga I asked if he was trying to lose weight. “Yeah”, at least 50 pounds”, he said, “and I think I know what to eat and all that, like fruits and vegetables and no cakes and fried foods.” Cool, I thought, he’s on the right track. Then I asked if he had 20 minutes every morning to go for a brisk walk. “Walk right out your front door and keep going for exactly 10 minutes, then stop, turn around and walk back”, I said, “and there’s your mile of cardio to start every day.”
“But that’s not the problem”, he said. “I think I can’t lose weight because I drink a lot of beer every day.” Then I asked, “Like what…two six-packs a day?” He answered, “Yeah, that sounds about right”.
Now if you’ve read my sexy new memoir, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, you know I also liked my beverages until I quit 5 years ago. Because 12 drinks a day is a lot of alcohol for any one of any size. And I told this guy so, then I gave him a suggestion. I recommended the following: Take ½ of everything you are going to eat or drink – every single time you eat or drink – for the next 30 days and give it to a homeless person. That’s right – wrap up half your food and half your booze, every day for the next 30 days, and give it to a homeless person. “You’ll be helping them and helping yourself”, I said, “and I bet soon into the 30 days you’ll be eating and drinking a lot less; and I guarantee you’ll lose weight.” Somewhere between 5-10 pounds I surmised, and for the New Year that’s only 3 months away, I told my large friend he should set his sights on 3 beers a day for all of 2013. He just looked at me in disbelief and said, “Wow, wouldn’t that be cool.” Yes it would, which I sincerely reinforced with my final four words of encouragement, “You Can Do It”.
Anyone can, if you STOP feeling sorry for yourself and BELIEVE you can! Get started today with a new attitude and a new look on whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish. Especially the impossible.
And my special thanks go out to NY and NJ’s “Entertainment Bible since 1988” Steppin’ Out Magazinefor featuring my poem on page 32 of their September 26th edition. A little something I wrote to help the ladies differentiate the good guys from the players called, “10 Ways to Avoid a Gigolo”.
Or shall I say, From Wall Street to Hollywood. Because if you didn’t already know, Screenland is synonymous with Hollywood and the movie industry. And you definitely know The Big Apple, my second all-time favorite city. Yes, it’s true, I’ve just moved back to Los Angeles – my favorite city in the world – after spending the past nine months exploring such unique and beautiful locales like Honolulu and San Francisco, not to mention my most recent adventures in Bushwick, Brooklyn.
In fact, when you read my intriguing new memoir that’s quite a page-turner, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, you’ll experience life in a plethora of other great cities I called home including Hong Kong, Singapore, Malaysia, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Princeton. And don’t forget my hometown of Trenton, NJ, where old-school Sicilian customs and traditions like representing the family, funerals, and falling off the truck were all the rage! Well, you get my drift. There’s tons of exciting stories from across the globe…with women attached, of course.
So I’m happy to report I’m “back in the wood” and here for good. North Hollywood, actually, because I always wanted to explore this NOHO neighborhood and Studio City part of town. At least until Howard Stern or Wendy Williams calls to have me on their NYC shows! Hey, ya neva’ know!
Have a great day everyone, and don’t forget to add at least a modicum of daily workout to your reading today. Enjoy – R
I received the nicest compliment at my gym this morning from one of the best built bodybuilders I’ve ever seen. For the past two months I’ve been working out everyday at Richie’s Gym in Brooklyn, and this guy’s physique is amazing. And if you’ve ever been to Richie’s, you know that it’s hard-core.
So when I went up to this twenty-something year-old monster to say goodbye and to say he reminded me of my days working out with Champion Phil Hill in the 80’s – which you’ll read all about in my memoir, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood – he looked at me and said, “Shit man, you’re old, I thought you were 30”. Nice. Then I said thanks, but add another 20.
And in case you were wondering what I looked like at age 30, here’s a picture featured in my book. Oh, and the secret to drinking from the ‘Fountain of Youth’ starts with these three simple words: DAILY FITNESS PROGRAM
Thanks again to all those who bought my book, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood. Post your comments below or on Facebook – love to hear them! And if you find yourself in San Francisco, you can buy a copy at Books Inc. in Opera Plaza, located at 601 Van Ness, and Browser Books in Pacific Heights, located at 2195 Fillmore St. With In-Store events coming in May!
You can also download the e-book on Kindle.com for $9.99
Here’s what readers are calling it thus far: enjoyable, inspiring, a great coast-to-coast read on a direct flight, fantastic, a real page-turner, and, wow, a well-written book with so many women. Well, what can I say, but there’s a really good chapter in there explaining the “cute-boy syndrome” and my retirement from “playing” aptly called, The Player Gets Played. And tons more stories that’ll humor you for a good 4 hours, or longer, if you get caught up on my multi-generational timeline of pictures – all 48 of them – from the early 1960’s to 2011.
So maybe you don’t want your 13-year old reading this, but if YOU do, you’ll learn something new about all sorts of places and things. Not to mention the plethora of businesses you’ll experience, including Wall Street and making movies. For sure you’ll be inspired to get up and try something new, or at least acknowledge that you could do something new, if you just believed in yourself and tried. Like a daily fitness program. Of course that’s in there too, in one of my favorite chapters, Self-Correct.
A portion of all sales is donated to my charity. Thanks for reading! Enjoy – R
