These five simple yet powerful words are meant to help ANY woman who’s being abused by a significant other and doesn’t believe she has the wherewith-all or courage to do something about it.
Case in point: A few months ago I had just returned to Hollywood when I met this really sweet thirty-something year-old gal who had been living with her lazy, no-good boyfriend for the past 5 years. And I say lazy, no-good because not only does this scumbag mentally and emotionally abuse my friend, but this disrespectful low-life doesn’t pay rent, doesn’t hold a steady job, doesn’t look for work, doesn’t cook or clean or help with chores around the apartment, doesn’t help pay for groceries, and doesn’t own a car but always uses hers. Now I would call that a blood-sucking disrespectful low-life, wouldn’t you? The good news is she doesn’t own anything with him nor do they have children together.
Yesterday I had coffee with her and specifically asked why she still supports this abusive scumbag considering she has ALL the power in the relationship, which by the way, has her looking like she’s suffering from Anorexia nervosa. She meekly said, “He’s not so bad, you know, and even if I wanted, I wouldn’t know how to get him out.” My advice was these five simple words – KICK HIM TO THE CURB. She just looked at me like I was crazy until I said, “It’s really simple if you have the courage to end it – and here are three ways you can do it: 1) tell your landlord you’re being abused by your live-in boyfriend and you need to move out, then pack up all your things when he’s not there and hire a few very large men to help you move everything into a storage unit and go live with your parents or your best friend; 2) on your way out the door tomorrow morning tell your boyfriend he’s got until 5pm to vacate the premises and never return again, at which point you’ll be returning with the police (or other suitable protection) and a restraining order against him; or 3) pack-up all his belongings when he’s not there and leave them on the porch with a note saying if he comes within 100 yards of you or your apartment ever again, you’ll have him arrested (and go directly to the authorities for that restraining order).
Anyone who’s familiar with my charity, The Boulevard Zen Foundation, knows that I’m passionate about changing the lives of women and children living in domestic violence shelters. And not just with a daily fitness program that’s based on Yoga, but with a self-respecting and open-hearted approach to life that starts with loving yourself and never letting anyone abuse you in any way, shape or form.
Know that ALL abusers are the weak ones, and know that ANYONE can find the courage to seek help from domestic violence organizations and shelters that are there for you.
Be strong and KICK HIM TO THE CURB – you can do it!
As for that scumbag boyfriend of yours – or anyone else abusing any man, woman or child – really look at yourself in the mirror and commit to changing your evil ways – you can do it! And you can start by reading my memoir, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, where a portion of all sales goes to support my charity and our Yoga teachers.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING Everyone! – R
PS – Don’t forget to get your workout in!