Is your man using you as an emotional crutch? Ladies beware…and Don’t Be His Mommy!
GYST #3: The Lost Art of Tipping
If you’ve ever worked as a bartender or server, you’ll love this. Because most people don’t have a clue when it comes to tipping. Are you one of them?
GYST: Get Your S#!T Together – Episode 1
I know what you’re thinking.
Here’s another no-nonsense East coast dude ranting and raving about getting your so-called shit together when it comes to everything from dating to fitness to landing that dream job.
You’re right…but in a good way.
Because everything from your social life, to your business life, to keeping yourself healthy and fit can be improved upon by really having your act together. Albeit, a much softer way of saying Get Your S#!T Together (GYST), the not-so inconspicuous name of my new podcast.
Enjoy – R
GYST: GET YOUR S#!T TOGETHER with RICH TOLA – Episode 1
Stick to Your Guns
Whenever I hear the expression “stick to your guns”, I think of Tom Cruise (aka Maverick) in the 1986 blockbuster, Top Gun, when he’s in the heat of battle with six hostile MiGs and triumphantly declares, “I will not leave my wingman”. Now that’s someone with true conviction who literally sticks to his guns, and one who sets a great example for anyone with little or no resolve to even make it through Lent without abandoning their abstinence.
Case in point:
I recently had dinner with two friends, a man and woman about my age (i.e., 50), who have each gained 20+ pounds in the past year. And both said exactly the same thing – that they “gave up sugar for Lent” and were determined to shed their unwanted weight. But when it came time for dessert, they both changed their tune and ordered the most sugar-filled items on the menu – Tiramisu in an edible chocolate cup and a slice of Red Velvet cake. So when I chuckled and asked, “Aren’t you going to stick to your guns and not eat sugar for the next 40 days”, they simply brushed me off and said it was no big deal since it was only this one time.
So much for having the courage and discipline to stick to their guns, especially when it comes to their health and well-being. Something I just can’t get my arms around (no pun intended).
Think about it. Setting your intentions and following through with your game plan, i.e., doing what you say, is not only good for your psyche and your self-confidence, but also helps everyone else around you because you’re leading by example. And if you don’t believe you can do it…NONSENSE. Just set your intentions and muster the fortitude to stick to your guns.
YOU CAN DO IT…just like I’ve been doing in Hollywood for the past 7 years. Peace – R
How to Live Strong and Stay Sexy
Everyone knows the expression “easier said than done” right? Well, that’s certainly not the case when it comes to Living Strong and Staying Sexy. At least it’s not if you’re always feeling good about yourself and radiating your Inner Beauty out into the Universe. Not to mention sticking to an energizing Daily Fitness Program that keeps your body (and your mind) strong and clear.
Believe in and commit to a Strong Body – Clear Mind. That’s my mantra, and it works! Just like the folks at Livestrong.com who are dedicated to building stronger, healthier and happier lives by offering authoritative expert content about diet, nutrition, fitness, wellness and lifestyle.
So if you’ve lost that strong and sexy feeling and could use a little fitness inspiration today, check out my “How To” videos on the healthy living website (click each title to watch the video):
#1 How to Burn Belly Fat & Lose Weight with a 7-Minute Interval Workout
#2 How to Do a Handstand & Touch Your Feet to Your Head
#3 How to Stay Active All Day
#4 How to Do a Back Stand
#5 How to Know Your Weight-to-Waist Ratio
#6 How to Warm-up for Squats
#7 How to Roll After a Jump
#8 How to Roll on the Ground
#9 How to Look for Yoga Teacher Trainings in Macomb County, Michigan
#10 Yoga Shoulder Shrugs
Enjoy – R
Never Assume it’s a Done-Deal
No matter what your “deal” is, never assume it’s a done-deal while it’s still a work-in-process.
Case in point: This morning I was advising a real estate broker friend on re-submitting a purchase offer on a piece of land in the Hamptons (a popular seaside resort in NY with some of the most expensive residential properties in the US) when I said, “Never assume it’s a done-deal”. He responded by explaining that last week the listing broker said the property owner accepted an offer from someone else, and that his bone fide buyer should just “wait and see”.
Wait and see…forgettaboutit!
How about speaking with your buyer and determining whether or not they could sweeten their bid by changing a deal point – like the deposit money or contingencies or closing date – I said. Because a real estate deal is never done until title to the property transfers and the money is in the bank (or better yet, your bank, since that means the deal closed and you got paid).
So whatever you do, Don’t Make Assumptions. It doesn’t serve you well and only leads to futurizing, i.e., obsessing over something that hasn’t happened yet and quite possibly may never happen. Focus on the present, and don’t defeat yourself with a done-deal attitude.
Enjoy – R
PS – Audio-Book for my memoir COMING SOON!
Celebrate the Emptiness
“Emptiness is the starting point. In order to taste my cup of water you must first empty your cup. My friend, drop all your preconceived and fixed ideas and be neutral. Do you know why this cup is useful? Because it is empty.” Bruce Lee
It’s simply about clearing yourself of negative energy and creating space in your being, your mind-body-spirit, to absorb new positive energies & opportunities from a neutral, white canvas-like starting point.
Easier said than done. But definitely achievable…because ANYONE can.
Have the courage and confidence to empty your cup today and Celebrate the Emptiness!
Enjoy – R
Beware the Secret Affair
Here’s a follow-up to my recent blog – or rather Rant – about helping Ladies to stop wasting their precious time with bad-boys who just wanna have fun. Because for the most part Ladies, guys can be quite ruthless when it comes to dating.
Case in point: last night I was hanging with a bunch of twenty-something year-olds who were enjoying themselves over numerous Vodka Cranberries and Whiskey Sours. So this drunk guy starts talking to me about this gal he’s been secretly sleeping with for the past month. Interestingly, about 20 minutes earlier I specifically asked him if he was dating the hot party gal sitting across from me. Because as the wily veteran that I am, it was obvious she was smitten with him. He said no, of course, and proceeded to flirt with her until he asked me to join him for a smoke outside. And once outside, he started spilling the beans about his wild love affair with her – including ALL the sexy details of their romantic dalliances.
But wait, it gets better. As soon as we return to the table, his covert gal announces her departure and quickly leaves (and she was definitely hoping he would accompany her, but he didn’t). And not only did he stay, but as soon as she left he started hitting on her friend sitting right next to him. At which point I leaned over and said three simple words, “Don’t do it”. He just smiled at me and kept on pursuing. Until I finally pulled him aside and said “Hey buddy, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”, and if he continues with his stupid pursuit he’ll certainly screw-up his torrid love affair and “be left holding his own d— in his hand”. He just smiled at me and said, “No chance pal, they’ll never know.”
Now it doesn’t take a genius to figure this one out, but there’s NO CHANCE this wanna-be Gigolo gets away with it. Fortunately for his sake, the unsuspecting friend denied his advances and soon left the bar. And fortunately for my sake, I didn’t have to be this chucklehead’s therapist since he didn’t say another word about it and was immediately hitting on other babes at the bar.
So there you have it Ladies – another disrespectful bad-boy who thinks he can score with two friends at the same time. Yes, I completely understand this mindset because 20 years ago I was this guy (go figure, right). So heed my advice and Beware the Secret Affair. And more importantly, when it comes to amateur Gigolos trying to be your Mr. Right Now, employ my favorite 4 letter word…NEXT.
And until next time…don’t forget to get your workout in! Enjoy – R
From The Big Apple to Screenland
Or shall I say, From Wall Street to Hollywood. Because if you didn’t already know, Screenland is synonymous with Hollywood and the movie industry. And you definitely know The Big Apple, my second all-time favorite city. Yes, it’s true, I’ve just moved back to Los Angeles – my favorite city in the world – after spending the past nine months exploring such unique and beautiful locales like Honolulu and San Francisco, not to mention my most recent adventures in Bushwick, Brooklyn.
In fact, when you read my intriguing new memoir that’s quite a page-turner, Simply Between Millions: From Wall Street to Hollywood, you’ll experience life in a plethora of other great cities I called home including Hong Kong, Singapore, Malaysia, Philadelphia, Chicago, and Princeton. And don’t forget my hometown of Trenton, NJ, where old-school Sicilian customs and traditions like representing the family, funerals, and falling off the truck were all the rage! Well, you get my drift. There’s tons of exciting stories from across the globe…with women attached, of course.
So I’m happy to report I’m “back in the wood” and here for good. North Hollywood, actually, because I always wanted to explore this NOHO neighborhood and Studio City part of town. At least until Howard Stern or Wendy Williams calls to have me on their NYC shows! Hey, ya neva’ know!
Have a great day everyone, and don’t forget to add at least a modicum of daily workout to your reading today. Enjoy – R
Set your sights…and weigh in!
Set your sights on new goals and opportunities, and weigh in. That’s right, it’s New Year’s Day so get on the scale and check your body weight. Because your weight matters, and having a known starting point for the new year is important. And the next thing you should do is workout. That’s right: weigh in and workout. Because preserving your body starts with a daily fitness program. So set your sights for 2012, and know that exercising every single day helps push back the hands of time – and unnecessary pounds of time.
Today I weighed in at 151, then did 30 minutes of abs and yoga stretches, then 30 minutes of weight lifting (mostly machines). Afterward I drove the amazing 5 mile stretch from Hawaii Kai to the Makapuu Lighthouse, hugging the shoreline around the southeast corner of the Island as the waves crash into the rocks below. The certainly challenging but very do-able uphill run starting from the Kalanianaole Highway up to the Lighthouse, well, it ranks second only to my favorite – Runyon Canyon in Hollywood. Not that the 1.5 mile loop around the Reservoir in NY’s Central Park, or the beautiful West River Drive and the Philadelphia Museum of Art steps aren’t great runs too! But the breathtaking ocean views along the narrow blacktop road leading to the Lighthouse are incredible. Not to mention the energy you feel as you pass the lookout for the Humpback whale sanctuary. Totally awesome. And worth running or walking – at least once in a lifetime!
I never imagined I would be traveling this lovely Hawaiian path when I first set my sights on publishing my memoirs less than six months ago. So believe in yourself and believe that you can. Then get on the scale and get started with your daily fitness program. Wherever you are! And if you don’t know where to start, how about strengthening your core with my 5 Minute Fat Burning Workout #81 – Plank Crunches. Happy New Year – R