The cycle of domestic violence occurs when abuse or victimization is passed down from one generation to the next. More specifically, it’s when children learn destructive behaviors from their parents, and then carry these acceptable behaviors with them into their lives. It must be broken. Case in point: Last night a friend called me to talk about his 22 year-old neighbor who was being verbally accosted by her drunken boyfriend. He said the screaming and shouting from the jackass was so bad that he was concerned for her safety and wasn’t sure what to do. And this wasn’t the first time this has happened. In fact, he said it was a regular event. He also said that when he passes the young gal in the hallway, he feels her insecurity and lack of self-confidence as she always looks away, avoiding any type of eye contact or conversation. Why does she put up with that crap, and what can he do to help her gain the self-confidence to get rid of the bum, my friend asks? Breaking the cycle of violence begins with re-building one’s self-worth and turning acceptable behaviors into non-acceptable behaviors. Like choosing to respect oneself everyday by making healthy choices and by constantly strengthening your body and your mind. Because it’s all about the choices we make. And each good choice leads to another good choice, and so on and so on. So respect yourself and make the healthy choice. Because anything is possible…if you believe you can.
Get “Zen in ’10”
I recently read the average American gains 10-15 pounds during the holiday months. As crazy as that sounds, people who gain weight around the holidays seem to rationalize it with a New Year’s resolution to lose the weight well before those bikini months. But why not get “Zen in 10” and start now, two weeks ahead of time, by consciously choosing to eat and drink healthier and beginning a new daily fitness program today – one you can do from the comforts of your own home? Especially anyone living in the Midwest and on the East Coast – I certainly feel for you! So stop futurizing, as I often say, and keep your thoughts and intentions in the present. It’s much simpler that way, plus you won’t feel the pressure to perform in the future because of what you did to yourself today. And when I say get Zen it’s about finding your own personal enlightenment through your thoughts and actions – today. Not tomorrow because who knows what that will bring. I should know. I spent my 20s and 30s futurizing about a life that’s completely different than the one I enjoy today. So forget about getting back to your workouts and losing that weight in January. Respect yourself. And I’ll see you today (and tomorrow) – R
It’s never easy
You’ll never hear me say that developing and maintaining a daily fitness program is easy. It just gets easier to keep it going. And more rewarding each time you workout, whatever you do. Like today vs. yesterday. Yesterday I felt like someone ran me over with a steamroller – you know the feeling. I barely made my 20 minute stretching and abs, but I made it. Today I felt like a million bucks! I hit the gym for an hour, then went for a 2-mile run at the Silver Lake Reservoir, then taught an 11a yoga class. And I’m 47 and lived a party lifestyle until I gave up alcohol three years ago. So change does happen if you really want it to. It’s never easy, but in the case of a daily fitness routine, it’s well worth it. So if you haven’t started one already, well let’s get going. Because with each passing day your body is not getting any younger, or firmer, or leaner, or stronger, or more flexible without doing something. So make that something the most important 1% of your life. See you tomorrow – R